"Its not that bad"

"Its not that bad"

 

No,  there's no comfort in it
There's no happiness in this, not to mention joy or anything along those lines,
There's really no comfort in this pain that's stinging dully on my arm from the nice slash made by the knife
Its not happiness yes but you know what else its not?
It's not saddness or anxiety or any of these depressive feelings hitting on me full force

Its not happiness i know but its also not the pain haunting me every minute even though it is pain alright
But its not painful pain
More like unpainful pain because it doesn't make me blink a thousand times just to take tears back
It is pain but it doesn't make me want to crawl into a ball and cry my heart out
It is pain but it doesn't make me feel any smaller that i already physically am
Nor does it make me question my entire existence and potential
This is no commercial
I'm not advertising my precious cut
Just hear me out;
For me It is distracting pain
That stinks only when i over exert my arm or when i rub on it accidentally
As of to remind me that " there's something else to focus your mind on babe" and i listen

Its calls me away from my emotions that envelop me and i listen
I roll up my sweater and look at it when it stings so badly and i see that " its not that bad" and for a moment I'm not sure whether i mean the cut or all these thoughts haunting my head but at least i know "its not bad"
Hear me when i say i know its not happiness
I know it doesn't take anything back
But i also know that it is not painful pain even though it is pain,
Pain thats only there to remind me that even though the cut stings "its not that bad"
Because this pain does go away and hopefully so will the rest..

©BlackRoseWrites
#weallmatter!